Thursday, August 21, 2008

Open Letter to Wheelbarrow Operator

Dearly Beloved Wheelbarrow Operator,

Clearly you thrive in your current occupation, for through my open window I can hear your squeaky wheel already diligently at work, shortly after sunrise, while I endeavor to catch those last few precious moments of shuteye before officially succumbing to wakefulness. Surely you do more with a wheelbarrow before 6:30am than some people do with a wheelbarrow all day. Any dirt wrongly-piled is swiftly and deftly righted by your wheelbarrowing assertiveness.

Yet I have this against you: Quite brazen are you to agitate a man before he brews his coffee. Please kindly investigate the virtues of WD-40, or consider becoming a slacker until, say, at least 8am – just to be safe.

Sincerely,
Inventor of WD-40 Use #2451

5 comments:

Jed Carosaari said...

Meskin. My condolences. I have a similar problem- a dog who constantly shakes his metal chain collar at night, while my dad's in the hospital and not there to take care of it; and a strange bowling ball (literally, the sound) being constantly dropped above my head in the middle of the night- especially strange considering this is basically a retirement complex. Why is an 80 year old bowling in their apartment at two in the morning? Naturally, eight in the morning I can see, but why two?

Unknown said...

Now that's funny stuff, you plagiarizer of revelation.....sneaky.

drh said...

Right on, Karin. I should give credit where credit is due. My influences were the last book of the Bible and the U.S. Army.

Abdul Muhib, I hope your dad gets well soon. And I hope those octogenarians don’t drop the ball again.

Lauren said...

I remember that squeaky wheelbarrow!!

Live In Contrast said...

I wonder, how does one translate terms like "squeaky" and "WD-40" into the local dialect?