…I dissected a cat. That was fun, but not what I expected in French class. I did not, however, enjoy the obnoxious person sitting on my right. They kept snapping their gum in my face and making gross sounds, so I asked them to stop. Mr. Luckey gave us an announcement about toilet paper. Isn’t that kind of thing obvious? I forgot my biology book.
So I lied and told him that my sister at it, and he believed me—funny, teachers these days. Anyway, so actually my mom ate it, but same diff. The teacher isn’t that particular. OK…so that was weird, and the I was like, “Gross! Go away you little brittle monkey,” and sent her to home detention. So I guess nothing actually happened, so the end of the world was close at hand and no one cared. Then a lot of zombies and their wives invaded New York for the hotdogs. I love NY!
Grapes aren’t always the best-smelling kind of sock. I stuck deodorant in Jim’s mouth and got sent to ISS. BOGUS! But it was the spray kind, and he thought it was breath freshener. Coughed it up. BOGUS!
Oh how I love frog legs. Oh, how I love frog legs—because they make me jump. So I jumped so much I forgot it wasn’t allowed. So I was sent home.
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